Quick Poll re: Boobs


Last night’s conversation between Greg and me:

Greg: You put a picture of your boob on the internet.

Me: Well, sort of. It doesn’t really look like a boob and it’s for mammogram awareness, so it doesn’t count as, like, putting a picture of my boob on the internet

Greg: Except that you put a picture of your boob on the internet.

Me: That’s not entirely true. I mean, yes. Technically, it’s my boob. But it’s the radio-active, x-ray version of my boob. Like what Superman would see if he x-ray visioned it. 

Greg: Exactly. It’s a boob.

Me: Which makes me feel a little sad for Superman for being maligned as a voyeur all these years. X-ray vision isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Obviously.

Greg: It’s still a boob.

Me: Yeah, but not a boob boob. I mean, it doesn’t look like a boob. It looks more like a jello mold with vertigo.

Greg: It’s a boob.

Me: Or a drunk jelly fish.

Greg: It’s a boob.

Quick Poll



Does this look like:

  1. a boob

  2. an anti-jello-mold campaign poster 

  3. a jelly fish who’s totally going to drunk dial his girlfriend and regret it in the morning




What do you say?

P.S. My next post will probably be about Jesus. This is your pre-whiplash warning. Also, thank God you and Greg put up with me. I am SUCH a weirdo.

P.P.S. Greg was laughing during our entire boob conversation. Horrified. But laughing. One time, when I was trying to convince him that life’s more entertaining being married to me than it would be if he’d married, say, a nice girl, I said, “SEE? You’re never bored with me!” And he said, “You’re right. I’m never bored. Never, ever bored. Frequently appalled. But never bored.”


ABOUT BETH WOOLSEY I'm a writer. And a mess. And mouthy, brave, and strong. I believe we all belong to each other. I believe in the long way 'round. And I believe, always, in grace in the grime and wonder in the wild of a life lived off course from what was, once, a perfectly good plan.
  1. Three. Totally three. And frequently appalling people is somewhat of an achievement compared to boring them, I say!

  2. #2 or #3, but no way #1

  3. *Totally* #3!!!

    And I feel sorry for Superman, too, if that’s all of the view he gets with his souped-up x-ray vision… :-/

  4. Oh how I’d LOVE to be a fly on the wall at your home!! Love this!

  5. Totally going with drunk jellyfish. Hands down. And, yeah, I definitely don’t think an x-ray picture of *anything* counts.

  6. Definitely a drunk jelly fish!

  7. I would say it looks like a drunk dialing jellyfish.

  8. It’s clearly *snort* a boob. I actually clicked on the link in your Facebook status because I saw the picture and thought; “Huh, a boob post. That looks interesting.”

  9. Number three, definitely.

  10. Okay, so TECHNICALLY, if we take the stance that a boob is a boob is a boob no matter what presentation or format, then your boobs already all over the internet. Just, you know, under a shirt. So the cows had already left the barn, so to speak. Greg, you’re a bit late to the party, my friend,

    Also, ROTFL with the jellyfish thing. I pick that one,

  11. Jellyfish on the verge of drunk-dialing…

  12. I go with the others that say no nipple, no boob.

  13. It’s hard to be objective about this. I agree with you; it’s not a boob boob- it’s for a good cause!

    Jellyfish is my vote!

  14. I say a jello mold, my husband says jelly fish. We both agree, it does NOT look like your boob on the internet

  15. From that face-up perspective I would not have imagined it to be a boob. it looks like a lopsided version of those electromagnetic globe thingies at a science museum. Or a drunk-dialing jellyfish.

  16. #1. But make sure to remind Greg that when he’s old enough to receive the friendly handshake of a prostate exam, that pictures are not required.

    1. I’m not the one you need to worry about. And no, I’m not taking my brother the urologist up on the offer to do it for free.

  17. #3 for sure!! Totally a jellyfish!!! LOL

  18. Looks like a jellyfish with an amazing rack. The kind of jellyfish that brings the boys to the yard.

  19. Since I’ve had my own mammograms I know it looks like a boob. BUT, since no nipple is showing I don’t think it’s at all inappropriate. Think of all the people who show pics of their latest ultrasound with baby on board. They’re posting a pic of their UTERUS and it’s contents! No difference.

  20. Drunk Jellyfish.

  21. How is an x-ray boob any different than women who post their vaginal ultrasound pictures of their fetuses online? They’re technically posting their coochies!

    This whole thread was hilarious. Yay for boob awareness!

  22. SUCH a drunk dialing jelly fish. Really Greg? A boob?
    You rock.

  23. I’ll go with #3, the drunk jelly fish. And tell Greg there’s no visible nipple so it doesn’t really count as a boob. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

  24. My 5yo thought it was outer space, so there.

  25. Boob, but then I’m a boob doctor. Objectively it looks like a jellyfish.

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